Oneshots of Haruhi Suzumiya
by wildrook
Summary: AKA, "What the hell did she read?" Basically, a list of one-shots that would be good ideas... First one-shot is Melty Blood-esque while the second one is Kingdom Hearts-based.
1. The Truth of Haruhi Suzumiya

The Truth of Haruhi Suzumiya.

Chapter 1.

(Enter Kyon's POV)

Okay, now some of you who are familiar with my satrical narration would expect something from the beginning of the series, but let's cut to the chase. I happen to be the only normal member of a club that contains God incarnate, an alien, a time traveler, and an esper and we're trying to find the supernatural, even though it's closer than we think. However, after summer vacation ended, we didn't expect truth seekers.

During my sophomore year in high school, I first met Haruhi Suzumiya because she usually sits behind me. After about a few weeks of learning her quirks, she and I had managed to get a decent conversation which led to the creation of the SOS Brigade, making me meet Yuki Nagato, Miss Mikuru Asahina, and Itsuki Koizumi, who were the type of people she wished to meet.

After a couple days in the brigade, I was given a note from the class representative, Ryoko Asakura, and as it turns out, she wanted to kill me that night...and would've succeeded if it wasn't for Nagato. The next afternoon, I met Miss Asahina's older self (which would've made Tanguichi cry for joy) and hinted to me how to save the world. That night, after investigating Ryoko's disappearance, Koizumi showed me the result of her frustrations: The Shinjin. And Closed Spaces as well. All of those were essential to realize that I needed to kiss Haruhi in order to save it.

Later on, I had Miss Asahina send me back in time to the event that started this whole mess, and as it turns out, I was her accomplice back then. I couldn't reveal my real name (well, my nickname), so I told her it was John Smith. Stupid, I know, but it was the only gajin name I could think of.

However it was this morning, before Itoshiki-Sensei's lesson (and yes, he's the same one from the manga. Basically, a result of Haruhi getting into it), Haruhi told me the straw that broke most of reality's back.

"Didn't you hear the news, Kyon?" she asked me.

No. Enlighten me.

"There's a mysterious transfer student coming in from America." America? Not exactly the best time to warn me. "Well, I could have told you much later, but since we're in the same class..."

"Miss Suzumiya," Nozomu-sensei said, "is there something you'd like to share with the class?"

"No, Nozomu-sensei. Just talking with an old friend."

He may have understood, but if I remember the series correctly, his old friend turned out to be someone he didn't know who wanted to compete with him. Then again, it was PARTLY my fault for introducing the series to her.

That, and Fuura Kafuka, the bipolar one, had just paid him for being called Pink Supervisor. One can only imagine what he did in order to be called that.

After school, I was waiting in front of what used to be the Literary Club waiting for Miss Asahina to get dressed. And the sour attitude is because of Itoshiki-Sensei going through a Despair Spasm.

"Come in," she said in her angelic voice. I did so to see that Yuki was reading (as usual) and Mikuru was in her maid outfit. "Tea, Kyon?"

"Yes, please," I said. After drinking it, Koizumi had entered.

"Something wrong?" he asked me.

Yeah, I happen to be suffering hearing damage from the results of the Slider, thank you very much.

"Well, if it's any consolation, Nozomu was not the slider." Huh? "Haruhi told me about the new transfer student, and he's on his way right now."

Great. What's his link to Haruhi?

"Nothing, now."

Say what?

"He doesn't seem to be interested in Haruhi, which makes me doubt that he's either from the Data Integrated Thought Entity or the Future. My Organization doesn't even have any record of him in the membership."

So...what is he?

"Possibly a curious individual."

Sure enough, said transfer student entered the room. He was wearing the usual school uniform, only with glasses and a green leather cap. However, the knife on his belt made me question his loyalty.

"Greetings," he said. "Don't mind the knife. It's basically self-defense."

Right...

"This is the transfer student I mentioned, Kyon," Haruhi said to me.

Okay, I wasn't exactly inclined to say this out loud, but here's what I was thinking: ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY?!? What I said was, "Is it safe for him to bring a knife into school?"

"He said it was from self defense from the Yakuza," she had replied. Uh, if I remember correctly, the Yakuza use guns, brass knuckles, samurai swords, and anything EXCEPT a hunting knife. Come to think of it, I'm starting to think he IS an alien.

I had looked at the others for help. Yuki was a bit indifferent, mind a bit of admiration from the guy (which was odd), Miss Asahina had looked at him like he was like me, and Koizumi...his was verbal.

"It's been a long time, Andrew," he said.

"Indeed," Andrew replied. "I didn't think YOU'D be here."

"You know the Vice-Commander?" Haruhi asked him.

"He and I share an apartment building. Other than that, we were old friends." I'm starting to dislike this guy already.

"In that case, Koizumi will explain everything about this club and what we do. If you'll excuse me..." She then left the room...which was odd, because she's usually on the computer looking for hits on her site. Oh, right. Beginning of the year means the computers are offline until tomorrow.

So we took the given time to ask the newcomer a few questions.

"What are you here for?" I asked him.

"Why ask that?" he asked me.

The members of the SOS Brigade happen to be here because of Haruhi. Nagato's studying her as an anomaly, Miss Asahina's here to observe her as a possible form of evolution, and your old friend here thinks she's some sort of God. If you're not here because of her, then why?

He then sighed. "In order to answer your question," he replied, "I ask you this: Is there any reason NOT to observe those quirks?" Huh? "Itsuki thinks she's a God, Yuki think's she's an anomaly in some kind of Matrix, and Mikuru is thinking she's a form of evolution. How do you even know they're not illusions?"

I've seen them for myself! Heck, I even felt the wind blow and the increase of power from them!

"Then you've answered your own question." Okay, this guy's crazy. "Like you, I happen to be a Truth Seeker, only you have no powers while mine are restrained."

Restrained?

"Yes, restrained. With these glasses, I have 20/20 vision, but without them, they can see flaws into the grand design of humanity. The knife's a form of defense I use against those who fracture reality."

And when did these powers surface?

"Four years ago, give or take a few days before the festival." Days? "These powers were an accident, Mr. Smith. Haruhi didn't have interest in the Truth. All she wanted to see were aliens, Time travelers, and Espers."

Okay, I was still not convinced for two reasons: One, he happened to be an American, and those kind of festivals didn't exist there, and two, he called me by my alias, which raises the suspicion meter up a bar.

"What is the Truth?" I asked him.

"Basically, a form of sight that is destructive to others, which means that without my glasses, I'm basically a killing machine." Sorry I asked. "And it's basically why I'm not interested in Haruhi in the first place. However, there are those who wish to disrupt her course."

"That's why he's here," Koizumi said. "During the vacation, Shinjin weren't the only beings appearing. Something was screwing up the time line beyond repair, and it has one objective: Destroy Haruhi and anyone else connected to her."

And I don't have anything to defend myself with.

"Not really," Andrew said. "You have a memento from your struggle against Ryoko."

I then checked my pocket to see Nagato's glasses and Asakura's knife. How did they appear in there? As it turns out, Nagato had slipped them in there during that time.

Nagato, why?

"Because you are to be Haruhi's Truth Seeker," she said.

"And I'm going to be training you," Andrew said. "If anything, there's a lot of things to be explained, and everything will be explained. I'm just not the one to tell you."

At that, Nagato closed her book, which signaled that everyone was done for the night.

I was walking home with these thoughts in my head. Something along the lines of 'Why did I have to befriend Haruhi' or something similar to that. The glasses are for restrained sight, which meant that I would be seeing fractures right and left if I didn't put them on. The knife is for destroying whatever is targeting Haruhi. If anything, Nagato and Koizumi are capable of defending themselves, but the Truth is nothing like a Closed Space. And I'll be damned if Miss Asahina dies by one of those things. As for Haruhi...as much as I hate it, I have to keep her safe. I don't know why, but I have to.

If anything, this school year is about to get worse.

To be continued...


	2. The Heart of Haruhi Suzumiya

The Heart of Haruhi Suzumiya.

Chapter 1.

(Enter Kyon's POV)

Okay...what just happened? First off, I was standing in front of Ryoko Asakura in what looked like a scene from a game I played, and the tide rolled in, dragging me off the island. Next thing I knew, I was running towards Haruhi like an old friend, then saw myself fall into the ocean...then actually did so. Now I'm standing on this stained-glass platform. I don't know what happened, but I KNOW Haruhi's to blame.

**So much to do, so little time...**

What the? Who said that?

**Choose your path.**

Not until you tell me what's going on!

**Alright. You are aware of the one known as Suzumiya, right?**

Know her? I'm pretty sure this is caused by her in the first place.

**Not entirely, young one. You'll get a better explanation when you experience it.**

Alright...if anything, I had to choose the shield.

**The power of the Guardian. An unbreakable shield. Also closes you off from others. Is this the path you seek?**

I guess...

**Alright.** The shield then went into my being. **You have gained the power to fight. Use them to defeat the Titans.**

The what?

As it turns out, they happen to be miniaturized versions of the Shinjin. All of them were appearing everywhere on the station, and I had to defend myself from them apparently. Luckily, the Shield doubles as a frisbee, although a bit heavier.

**Behind you!**

I looked and saw one get on me, but I dodged it and killed it. Behind me was a door, but I couldn't get through.

**The door won't open yet.** No kidding. **You're a satirical one. Tell me about yourself.**

As it turns out, I had appeared in the SOS Brigade room.

Walking up to Nagato, I didn't really have anything to say to her, but she had asked, "What's your dream, Kyon?"

My dream? Well...I guess I might be a philosopher.

"Is it of any importance?" With the stuff I deal with, it is.

"Kyon," Koizumi said, "what's your goal in life?"

Ending all these shenanigans, one way or another.

"Aren't they beneficial to growing up?" Huh?

Sure enough, Miss Asahina asked a question I didn't expect. "What's your greatest fear, Kyon?"

Dying from one of Haruhi's thoughts and ideas...

"Why are you afraid then?" Afraid? I'm terrified of that! Before I could retort, I found myself back at the platform.

**You want to be a philosopher, you're trying to end the game, and you fear dying from it.** After a couple seconds... **Your journey begins as soon as you wake up. If anything, you've dealt with stuff that one can only dream of, but you have yet to face the true horrors that lie within.**

Sure enough, the door had appeared through it's translucent gaze and I had walked through it.

**But be careful. For when you get closer to the light...your shadow grows.**

As it turns out, the shadow did more than just grow right behind me. It had changed into a Shinjin...or what I thought it was. Then again, are they usually that dark?

Then it attacked, and I had the decency to dodge. If anything, Nagato and Koizumi aren't exactly aware of what's happening, so getting them to help is out of the question. However, I was able to stop it from trying to kill me and defend myself. If I'm going to go out, I should at least die trying!

Without thinking, I had jumped up...and punched the black Shinjin in the face, much to my surprise.

**That was rather...unorthodox.** Where the hell have you been? **I'm a disembodied voice, kid. And that was not a Shinjin.** NOW you tell me? Then what did I hit?

**The Darkness within your heart, young Kyon.  However, it won't go away just from that single hit.  You must overcome it in order to protect Suzumiya, but don't be frightened, for the one who chose you...is you.**  Oh, right.  The Star Festival four years ago...

As it turns out, more of those shadows had started to surround and engulf me in darkness...

(End dream sequence)

I then woke up with a start, noticing my surroundings. I was at home...the sun was slightly rising...and it's six-thirty. I might as well get ready.

However, my phone rang. I then scrambled to the floor getting my usual uniform on and answered it.

"Who is it?" I groggily said.

"Kyon, it's me." Koizumi. "I'm assuming you had a strange dream last night?"

I was a bit surprised. "How did you know?"

"Yuki called me earlier about how she got a shield in her apartment. Weird thing was, I got a staff around the same time."

"And that doesn't surprise you as odd? No one supplies weapons through the mail..."

"Exactly. If anything, it's basically bigger than the Closed Spaces that I usually deal with because it was ME who got it."

Wait... "Where exactly are you calling from?"

And cue the doorbell. I opened it to reveal Koizumi and Nagato with their respective weapons (Nagato works with defense while Koizumi uses a sun ball to fight, so a staff is respective for him).

You two realize what time it is right now?

"Roughly around Six hours, Thirty-Four minutes, and fifteen seconds," Nagato said.

"Other than that," Koizumi said, "I doubt your weapon came in a physical form."

At that note, it had appeared in my hand in a flash of light. A giant key. A keyblade, to be precise.

"Koizumi," I said, "what happened?"

My answer came in the form of shadows appearing out of the ground in physical form.

"I think we'll explain what's going on after we take care of the Shadows," he said.

"Processing Data," Nagato said. "Chances of survival, limited."

Obviously, they've never faced a camelcricket before. These Shadows, I mean.

As we went into battle, we then took out the Shadows like they were parasites from an unknown source. After the last one was gone, we had stopped for a breath.

Again, what happened?

"Well, after leaving the SOS Brigade, Haruhi had picked up a game that was said to be good, and now we're experiencing it."

Well, judging by the incident and what we're using, it's pretty obvious that she bought Kingdom Hearts. If this gets out, Nomura's going to throw a fit.

Wait. "I first saw Ryoko in my dream, and I think she would play the role of Riku, except she'll try to get Haruhi's heart out of my system."

"You've played it before?" Nagato asked me.

I sometimes dabble in the Video Game store with Miss Asahina and pick up a few things while we search for the Supernatural...or people like you.

"Then we've no time to waste," Koizumi said. "If anything, the Keyhole's pretty obvious." The SOS Brigade room. "And Haruhi's now a Princess of Light, judging by your explanation."

Right, I forgot that he was there with me that day.

Hang on, Haruhi. If this gets out, we're going to have a LOT of explaining to do.

To be continued...


End file.
